Thursday, November 17, 2005

Who knew that these trips would challenge my ethics and manners so often—every night, in fact. Something you may or may not be aware of is that all hotels, no matter how nice, have thin walls. Inevitably you hear the walking, urinating, flushing, showering and blow-drying of your neighbors. Through the walls, snippets of conversations, whether on television or in person, float to your ears and you are faced with a decision: to listen or not to listen. Now, for many people, the choice may be obvious, but to me, there is a little gray area. If people are talking loudly, knowing how thin the walls are, then do they in some way intend for the conversation to be overheard? Do they hope a helpful neighbor will weigh in with a suggestion or question? I hear discussions about restaurants, activities, kids, the works and I wonder if they would appreciate comments from the peanut gallery. At moments, I consider calling the front desk, asking to be connected to room number XXX, informing them that all the rooms around them can hear and that they should try to Chinese place on the corner. Would that fly?

But, the sounds go beyond talking and lead into more intimate places. Occasionally, I hear couples fighting and/or making love, men snoring, women crying and I really don’t know what to do. When in the throes of passion, people don’t think about whether or not they are broadcasting to the rest of the hotel. During fights, crying and sex, I never know what to do with myself. The sound fills my room and grows louder with the volume of my television. I cannot escape it. Sometimes I fight my urge to appease and diffuse, instead choose to imagine the characters in question and how I might go about making them feel better. While listening to sex, I feel simultaneously jealous, happy and grossed out. Sex, as lovely as it is, generally does not display us at our most attractive, at least to outsiders. The range of screams, moans, giggles, cheering, and the myriad of other responses are inescapable and just a little stomach churning. I mean, I feel happy that people are finding pleasure with each other (at least I hope they are), but I am just not sure I want to hear it. When I paid for my room, I really just wanted to room and not my own dirty sound effects studio.

My conclusion is that hotels need to make the walls a little bit thicker, or we should eliminate any guilt society assigns eavesdropping. Right now, I am constantly riddled with guilt because I know I am not supposed to be hearing what is going on, but I do, and how can I not listen! From this moment on, I am releasing myself from guilt and I will listen unabashedly to my neighbors. I will celebrate the sounds and then write about them on this blog.

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