I always thought the things that would most make me feel like a grown up would be my first drink of alcohol, the first time I rented a car without an extra fee, my first "real" relationship, my first "real" job or perhaps the first apartment of my very own. As each one of these events has occurred, I check in with myself to see if now, at this very moment, I have become an adult, but the answer was always no. Recently, however, I have been feeling very much like an adult, and after some thought, I realized what two moments it was that jarred me into this new phase.

The first event was watching one of my best girlfriends get married. I have been to a number of weddings for close guy friends, but it was the wedding of one of my girls that made me realize I am an adult. Throughout the whole planning process I teased my friend because she had all of a sudden become knowledgable about flower arrangements, linen color coordination, cake decorations, honeymoon locations, diamond cuts and carats, and so much more. I asked if she was infused with knowledge when her man slid the ring on her finger as he proposed--if the ring has special powers to fill her with "big girl thoughts." She laughed at me and claimed she just read a lot of magazines, but I still think the ring may be a component. The wedding was stunning, and the couple is so enviously in love--and as I watched them dance their last dance, I felt that I had joined the elite club of adults. The fact that I am now at an age where I could get married with no one raising an eyebrow and asking,"Aren't you a bit young?" Instead, I think people will release the breath they didn't realize they were holding and say,"Phew!" when I announce my engagement. I have to say, that is an odd, sobering moment to have--especially while watching someone you love get married.

The second moment I realized that I am getting older was, surprisingly, at a college fair in Cincinnati. This college fair was filled with bright teenagers and their parents, excited and nervous about speaking with college reps. You might be thinking that being around teenagers might make me feel older, but it actually has the opposite effect. Being around these freaked out, anxious and energetic young people reminds me of how it awful it is to be a teenager. Each time I talk to a teen, I remember so clearly what it was like to be worried about rejection, acceptance, and futures. I acutally have to remind myself when I leave these events that I have already passed that stage, never having to return and I feel joy. At this college fair, the thing that made me realize I am an adult was this hot guy at the table next to mine. He seemed about my age, dark and handsome with a lovely speaking voice. We started chatting about our respective schools, where we are from, etc and I got just a tad excited. I am comfortably single at the moment, but I wouldn't mind a date every now and then and this guy seemed like a solid option. Then, while talking and gesticulating about the location of the college he represents, I noticed the gold band on his left ring finger just as he casually mentioned his wife. At this moment it struck me that all of the attractive men I have met in the past five months or so are married. I have reached the age where I now have to check fingers before I start talking to a guy to determine the appropriate way to approach him. When did my entire peer group get married? Where was I when all of this was going on? Clearly, I have missed the boat. I knew I was in really big trouble with Cincinnati guy when, for one fleeting moment, I thought,"Maybe it won't last!" This made me almost fall over with guilt. Having been raised as a conscientious Christian girl, I pride myself on having good character (character being your thoughts and actions when no one is watching) and now, as I meet married man after married man, my character is being challenged. Don't worry! I have complete respect for the institution of marriage--I just have moments of evil thoughts.

In conclusion, it is the marriage bug that has made me feel like an adult. After attending wedding after wedding and meeting married guy after married guy, I have truly entered the next phase. Some of my older friends, in attempt to make me feel better (I think) have said,"Just wait until the babies come!' My response: I can't wait....no, really, I can't wait!